sometimes illusions aren't so simple.

Saturday, June 30, 2007

As a rapturous voice escapes;I will tremble a prayer.

Off to tellytubbyland with Diy.

Met up with the other ketiak to have a-so-called-photosession for me

and watched Dyn did his photoshoot for his portfolio.

Diy was the model of the day,Dyn the photographer,

aku,buat sebok sebok je.

Well anyways,it was a short short photoshoot.
Under the blazing sun.

note,BLAZING BLAZING sun.

guess what? me and Diy turned into Ma-pe-lehs.

Diy even had a line on her ring finger lahh.

That is how bad our sunburnt is.

I have a line on my forehead and my hands,

thank goodness for long sleeves.

Well,Diy had to make do with her new, not so chocolatey skin colour.

It was just a few minutes under the sun and we turned black.

wah piiaaannnggg eh.

and now,assignments. haish.

i wonder what's going on over there.

i feel like oh.

If you've got the poison then I've got the remedy.

bollywood fusion dance with twinny was SUPERB.

got to meet two other loves after that.

The princess for the day;miss yasmin

and the girl who kept complaining she wanted to vomit;miss diy.

omg. my brother got himself a minah for a girlfriend.

super minah.

she listens to techno,have a fetish for pink

and has super thin eyebrows.

techno?! wth.

and i can see it coming,baby.

through thick and thin.

but still,this feeling inside i couldnt avoid.

this heavy feeling.

i admit i taste fear.

its possible,baby,its possible.

imy love.

down on my knees, im begging you.

please,please don't leave me.

come naddy sing with me.

haish.

Thursday, June 28, 2007

SMACK ME BECAUSE THIS IS MY 4TH POST FOR THE 28TH.

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY ABANG IWAN.!
ALL I COULD SAY.
GET MARRIED NOW!
AND GIVE ME HAPPY HAPPY NIECES AND NEPHEWS.
faster lah.tsk.

*muka aku penat habis baru habis rewang*

fourth.

Forget it already.

down on my knees;im begging you.

I remembered posting on my I-wish-s.

I wished i was beautiful like Naima from ANTM.
check it out. says:
u are beautiful in ur own way.

I wished i had eyes of an Arabian girl.
check it out. says:
ur eyes are perfect the way they are.

I wished i was poetic and romantic.
check it out. says:
i love ur poems and ur entries in ur blog. u dont need to be romantic, be sincere.

I wished i had a gift.
check it out. says:
a gift. ur a gift alredi. God gave u a life, thats a huge gift.

I wished "friends forever" really exists.
check it out. says:
i'll try my best to be ur friend.
check it out. says:
forever.

I wished i could remember well enough.
check it out. says:
u remember me right?

and i will pray silently,that you are always protected and guided by Allah.
and that day,I was happy when i saw barffer.

it was Jan 8.

photo: Amalina

I AM MISSING YOU PEEPS TOO. AND I KNOW YEAH,ALL OF US ARE BUSY BUSY POLY STUDENTS. FARID, GDLUCK WITH ATTACHMENT, AMALINA, ALL THE BEST FOR YOUR JOURNALS (:, SYA, I HOPE BOTH OF US WONT FAINT BECAUSE OF P2, AND SYAM, AAAHHHH. MUST WIN YOUR BAND WHATEVER-COMPETITION THINGY OKAYY. *kalau aku free baru aku turun.muahahaha.*

and the next outing, i think we will plan and plan and in the end it will be cancelled again. Heeeeeeeeeeee. Plus im super busy already. Find time people!

the ex.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

To paradise with pleasure haunted,
Haunted by fear
A sin for him.

Desire within, Desire within
A burning veil
For the bride too dear for him
A sin for him.

Desire within, Desire within
Fall in love with your deep dark sin
I am the fallen.
You are what my sins enclose
Lust is not as creative
As its discovery.

A sin for him.

God I must confess.
I do envy the sinners.

nightwish.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

tiq-HOTTT NENEK

cin-SEXXAYY MAKCIK

khai-OOH LA LA IBU.

The forever typical finger-together-act-cute-for-picture pose.

And we got butterfly rings!

HOT YOGA AGAIN.

this time with this two gila monsters. heeee.

Lots and lots of laughs.

And we saw each other in our half-naked state.

They loved hot yoga.

And Cin is really gundu today.

Yes sexxayy makcik,you cant even pronounce Hyatt hotel.

HIAKDDDUUUSSHH!

And this Friday,its Bollywood Fusion dance.

*yesh khai.u signed up for a dance class.

FOR ME LAH SEYY. wa sayang sama lu ah ooh la la ibu*

Together with Twinny!

and. right after yoga.

i indulged in MCD large fries with extra sweet chilli and extra mayo.

so much for burning my fats.

schoolisdrivingmecrazy.

i have multiple deadlines. i have piling assignments.

and my gawd.its only the second day of school.

looks like those bags under my eyes aren't going anywhere anytime soon.

i got to check in the rehab.

cuz baby you're my disease.

you were.

Monday, June 25, 2007

Ohhhhhhhhmmmmmm.
Take in all the positive energy, inhale....exhale...and let everything out.. let your head hang and relax..

Hatha Yoga is relaxing.

"Think of one thing that you are most grateful about today."

And I thought about him.

I want to see that gigi now.

stay strong love.

Its the first.
It just means theres more to know.
More to meet.
More to understand.
More to go through.
and,
More to overcome.
InsyaAllah.

The lover,sunny sunshine,coolshitcool,awwing-sweet and nothing ordinary;
All wrapped into one with a ribbon on it.

daripada yang sedang sedang saja.

Sunday, June 24, 2007

TELL ME BAKING WAS FUN WITH TWO OF MY LOVES.

They liked my full length mirror.

This doesnt look like a C, or an A or a K either. But hey! We are the CAK girls!

Heeeeeeeeeeeeee, uuuuhhhh, mmmmmmmmm.

Woke up early, all excited because I was going to bake with khai and cin.Unfortunately, I couldnt follow them to Poon Huat to get all the ingredients because I woke up and my house was in a state of madness.So i had to clean the house before those two come over.Well baking wasn't really my type of thing. But baking with them is lovelove.hahaha! And we made choco muffins and "famous amos" cookies. Love the muffins. "its edible" though. But the cookies wasn't good initially. Something just wasn't right,since we skipped a few ingredients and it came out flattened and chewy. We added more flour; advised by someone's friend and my mum. And it turned out better. But I still love our muffins.

Like finally, we get to bake.After alot of plannings and cancellations. Good good pleasant Sunday. Babes,come over more okayy. Oh! Khai says my room is girlish.hahaha!

The only bad thing is. SCHOOL IS STARTING LIKE TOMMORROW. 9 am till 4 every single day. ARGH! i don't have the energy to continue my project 2. I so don't want to have anything to do with Fareast Plaza anymore.But sadly, i cant! i have to face it. Damn. School.

muffins for you.
and its
in less than an hour.

last.

Work is getting more enjoyable every day.
Staffs are closer to each other and we communicate better nowadays.
And so, even if its busy,its still fun fun.
We created a Seoul Garden dance, which is very merepek actually.
But when we do it together,haha.who cares.

Anyway, the outlet went blackout like thrice.
And after the first,we had to off the fire for each table,
and my goodness,its a fullhouse.
So imagine all the staffs scattering around, switching off table by table,
to prevent any fire whatsoever lah.

And the lights came on again, just to go off another time after that.
and ade lah customer sueeyyy.
"how long will this take ah? im in a hurry to eat."
kalau dah in a hurry tu,makan ala carte je,nak masak masak semua buat ape.
gendreng telor bachin.
and after that...just before dinner time,
theres a fire alarm.
So,the escalators stopped, and theres no gas.
And again, we had to do the same thing.
But this time,almost all the stores at the same level had to stop operating.
in the end; WE HAVE INVESTIGATED THE SITUATION,
AND IT IS A FALSE ALARM.

and my body aches like crazy;i think its the yoga.
well,i SO cants waits fors laters, we are going to bake bake.

quoted; " IM A HAPPY HAPPY GOOBER TODAY."
Woke up when my phone sang Ashanti's Foolish.
Answered ah ah ah ah ah all the way.
And before that i dreamt i got myself a D40.with my own ka-chings.
And sap sap sap.Im out without eyeliner,make up,nothing.
In my selekeh home attire,to show someone my morning state.
And my oh my; did i get a pleasant surprise.
THANK YOU.

with God's will.

Friday, June 22, 2007

HOT HOT HOT HOT YOGA!

and thats us in Twinny sweatpants.

Too small for me,too big for Naddy.

Hot yoga is definitely hot.

WORTH my time,i guess.

But it needs alot of balance,endurance and flexibilty.

And i suck at all.

So me and Naddy are always always tumbling and trembling.

While the aunties there are steady pom pi pi's.

Its really a good experience.

Plus,I got 7 days of free trial at the centre.

And i am so going to enjoy it.

And Naddy,i cant wait.

We will have BELLY DANCING.

BOLLYWOOD DANCING.

BHANGRA DANCE.

CARDIO,KICKBOXING.

SEXY BELLY DANCING.

MODERN DANCE.

BALLET.

and so much more.

to my friends,if any person from True Yoga calls you and ask you down.

Please make yourself free and go go go!!

Be prepared,Cindy,Khairiah,Afini,Ayuni,Nurul Aini.

oh;orang putehs are really really open people.
theres two of them who went totally topless,nipples out for everyone to see in the changing room. Haha. We were like..err.Oh,its normal;I acted cool.

Hold on to me, love.
For all i wanted was to say
i love you and I'm not afraid.

inhaleANDexhale.

TOLD YOU I FOUND MY SECOND TWIN.
5 MORE TO GO YA'LL.

SHE'S GOT A DIMPLE ON HER LEFT CHEEK,LIKE MY LEFT CHEEK.
*THOUGH I HAVE DIMPLES ON BOTH OF MY CHEEKS*
AND SHE'S BUCK-TOOTHED,LIKE ME.
AND I THINK I HAVE HER EYES.

MINUS THE MOLE ON MY RIGHT CHEEK.
AND MY HIDUNG IS BAWANG.
AND I CANT SING LIKE HER.

TAPIKAN. MULUT DEKNI ADE TERBESAR SIKIT. WAHAHAHAHA!
BUT HER VOICE IS REALLY NICE.

yeeabaahhhhhhh;!
imma have my hot hot yoga later with sayang naddy.
Its gonna be FUN FUN.
Atiqah and Nadiah.
In sweatpants and T shirts and erm,long sleeves.
Stretching, stretching, sweating and stretching again.
And hey! Me and Naddy are flexible girls okayy.
Thanks to netball,I think.
Wooooaah.
Tiq and Naddy doing yoga.
Macam hott gitu kann.

kayla. i gotta bounce ya'll.
wa mahu lipat kain.
Gotta bounce?

Nigger-ish,isn't it?

this within temptation.
oh yeah I have to stand my ground.
I just embraced.

hauntingly.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

SELAMAT HARI LAHIR NASIRUDDIN BIN SHAIFUDDIN.

MAY YOU CELEBRATE MANY MORE BIRTHDAYS TO COME.

....................

Untuk kau lah ehh.

ni lah pantun.chey chey.pat friendster nanti aku sambung.

........................

Berburu ke padang datar,

Dapat rusa belang kaki,

dah satu,dua,tiga,TIGA KALI dah daftar,

eh lu! bile mahu pass lesen ni??

....................

haaaah! dok. dah 3 kali seh dok.

Takpe takpe.

Aku doakan,the 4th time, kau dapat lesen kereta.

InsyaAllah.

......................

and Farah,sorry i didnt dedicate a post for you. I was busy yesterday night.

But,you got my sms hor!

Love you awak,happy birthday again.

......................

and dream,i do.

are you my number one?

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Say goodbye to old decemberillusions.

Im revamping her tonight.

force vomit.

Monday, June 18, 2007

Pardon me but i feel like reggae-ing and daddy yankee-ing for a while.
Dont worry.
It will be just for a while.
(:

Sunday, June 17, 2007

I won 11 million dollars!!

Well, watched Oceans 13 just now. And George Clooney is super duper cool and hot at the same time. And definitely hotter than Brad Pitt. Heeeee.Okay,fantasizing. Day was spend with love and its nice to finally "let my hair down" a little.And after slacking one whole day at home on Saturday,its nice to go out again. Well yeah. And Oceans 13 is really good actually.Im impressed at how intelligent humans can be.And, robbery has never been that cool.Plus its quite funny. Oh,catch it if you may. I thought I wouldnt understand the movie and that fantastic 4 would be a better option but hey, its good to change your tea to coffee once in a while.And i enjoyed it.

Bastard! Sapppp! is now changed to Bastard ! Suuuuuppppppppp.

You and your nonsense hulk hogan moves.lmao.GTBA GTBA!

After which had dinner and mum had to spoil the day again.

Pfffffffffft.

But thanks for being there.

and.Happy Fathers Day Ayah.

lovelovelongbusridesstill.

seeyouwheniseeyou.

ARRGHH.

IM SUCH A GUNDU.

LIKE SERIOUSLY.

I STILL CANT BELIEVE IT.

MAK AIIIII.

SO THE BENGAP LAH SEY.

Saturday, June 16, 2007

LUCKY LISP.

mood: bored to death.

listening to: mat rips macam paham berskateboarding bawah block.

macam nak campak telor dari atas :/

Even normal hawker chicken rice stalls knows how to improve business.

Ain't this cute?

Heart-shaped chicken rice? At a hawker centre. (:

Macam pahammm aje makcik tu kasi chicken rice ber-heart.

and you;

don't think you are some superhero lah.

you cant be working and on the go go mood all the time.

tsk.

i think i am going to blackmail KFC soon.

I slacked all day long at home today.

Even the TV bores me now.

No more nice Saturday Hindi movies.

I couldnt do my laundries even.

Because it has been raining all afternoon.

So ended up coming online.

Chatted with my bitch Miss Lola.

*Mr Sony is back selepas seminggu berscandal dengan Mimin*

And basically thats it.

Oh!

And i joined some berpantun club!

Weeehhooo.

Fun lah okay!

Come,join our club.

tell me its real,

the feeling that we feel.

Morissey-ed.

Friday, June 15, 2007

4C Reunion is cancelled.

Somehow I knew this would happen.

Bleeeeaaahhhh.

Too bad,since too many can't make it.

And yar,its postponed.

And I have a feeling,it wont happen anytime soon either.

So 4C,i guess there will be no reunion this year?

All busy with their own stuffs.
But hey,we should meet up lah seyy.

It has always been the 16th every year.

And 18th.

Hahaha.

Well,looking foward to the postponed reunion afterall.

I can hear my youngest brother screaming

and wailing in pain right now.

He got a bisol on his buntut.

Hahahahah!

Tsk.too bad for him.

And he cant go swimming this Sunday.

A family outing,with mum's friends.

And,of course.

I refused to go.

FACE TO EAR.

AWWWWW.

OH YES,I DID BLUSH INSIDE.

TOO BAD THERES SOMEONE WATCHING BEHIND.

I WOULD HAVE SAID IT TOO.

IT WAS A SHIOKNEHNEH MOMENT.

and someone said i look like Fiza O.

FIZA O?

Apee seeeeeyyy?

radd.

lovelovelovelovelovelove.

hate is a strong word,

but i really really really don't like you.

Got some bruises,blue blacks and whats nots from siol garden. Pffft.

Can i ask something?

The same never-ending question,as claimed by Miss Lola a.k.a mimin.

BILE NAK JOGETT??!!

Okay.Too little time.Too many outings.

Theres 4C reunion, SG peeps outing, Naddy and Iqah hot yoga, Apit and Wak Gendreng meet up,Cin and Khai baking session, time with love.I'm so lost in my own busy schedule.hah.lols.So sesiapa yang menunggu nak keluar sama sama tu, sabar sabar yer.

Shrek3andlovecomesfirst.

khai and cincin!NEXT WEEK.we can bake bake bake.come over to my house okayy babes.Can see my ugly fuggly flowery room. (:

By the way, Miss Happiology, I will prolly pass you your Jodi Picoult by this Saturday. Sorry for waiting babe.

you're taking over me.

greentea.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

PIMPLY ISSUES.

WOAH. My love got his first pimple. Yes Diy, your little guy over here got his first pimple. Right in the middle of his nose. Haaa.And he was asking me about the facial foam I was using and wether it will help remove his pimple.Haaaa.Cuteness. And I told him yeah. He used it. Kekkee.

I had been doing free labour for 2 days now.Some guys from the high high position is coming down to the outlet im working in to check the cleaniness and yada yada yada. And so, all of us are asked to clean,scrub and clean and scrub again almost the whole Seoul Garden. Work that was supposed to end at 10.30 ended at 11.11 sharp today. So basically,we did more than half hour of work and we are not getting paid.

And to add to all that fatigue, mum told me all her friends are coming over tommorrow afternoon.And she warned me to clear the hall and my room. Haish. ITS MY ROOMM! and her friends shouldnt be entering my room. And its my problem if I want to keep it clean or not. And please eh,its clean. She just had to find something for me to do. Its her friends,so she should do right. GOSH.ONE DAY.ONE ONE FATEFUL DAY.Im going to bomb that CNI company and before I do that, I will put all the people that's related to it inside. And life will be peaceful. Trust me, if all those CNI people die,life will be better.Like totally.

Okay that's so bitchy of me.Heeeee.

I still hate all of them and I still wonder why my mum wants to have any relationship with them.I hate them.I HATE THEM.Especially those makcik satellites that only knows nyet nyet nyetting about others' business.

Oh,THANK YOU DIYANAH! for nominating me for the Yoga Class.I can't wait! And Naddy, you will be my partner.Heeeee. YesYes, at least this will put a start to my weight loss mission.And its free. (:

On a more happier happier happier note, I will be seeing you tommorrow.

Yessssaaarrrrr.

hot yoga.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

The girl I love with all my heart story.

i just wanted to share.Haha.

A story some guy wrote for a girl he loves.

And what she made him feel by leaving.

The girl I love with all my heart: One

I say: It is a lovely day.
The girl I love with all my heart replies: I love a boy. He is my boyfriend.
Damn and blast it, I think to myself, this isn't going very well, and so I say: You are beautiful.The girl I love with all my heart smiles and says: My boyfriend is very handsome. I think you would like him.
I nod, and start to cry.

The girl I love with all my heart: Two
I open my curtains and let the sunshine in. It is a new day, I think to myself, it is a new life. But then I notice the girl I love with all my heart sitting in the tree outside my house. She is holding a placard which reads: I am having sex on a regular basis with my boyfriend. I love my boyfriend. He is very handsome.
She waves at me.
I close my curtains and start to cry.

The girl I love with all my heart: Three
There is a knock at the door. It is a delivery man. He is holding a six-foot seven-inch cardboard cutout of a man. I sign the delivery man's receipt book and take the six-foot seven-inch mystery man into the kitchen. There is a card attached to it. It is from the girl I love with all my heart. The card reads: This is a life-size cardboard cutout of my boyfriend. As you can see, he is very handsome. And quite muscular.
I look at the cardboard man leaning against my freezer, light a cheap cigarette, and start to cry.

The girl I love with all my heart: Four
The phone rings. I pick it up. It is the girl I love with all my heart. 'Hello,' I say.
The girl I love with all my heart replies: Hello. I have just had a triple orgasm. My boyfriend is brilliant in the bedroom. I have never been so satisfied in all my life.
I slam the phone down and start to cry.

The girl I love with all my heart: Five
I am having a wonderful dream about naked ladies I've only just met. Suddenly the girl I love with all my heart appears at the foot of my bed. She is completely naked. 'Hello,' I say, 'have you come to join us?'
The girl I love with all my heart shakes her head, clicks her fingers, and the naked ladies that once draped across my bed suddenly turn into a hairy-arsed man. 'This is my boyfriend,' smiles the girl I love with all my heart. 'We are going to have sex now. You can watch us if you want, but we could be here all night - having sex with each other in every position known to man.'
After seven hours of utter hell, I finally awake from my torturous dream and start to cry.

The girl I love with all my heart: Six
I wander aimlessly down the street. Suddenly the girl I love with all my heart appears before me. 'I've stopped smoking,' I shout, 'kiss me now, kiss me now. I smell so sweet'.
The girl I love with all my heart scrunches up her dead cute face and says: You smell of poo. My boyfriend smells much nicer than you. He smells of pheromones and manly things. And he is extraordinarily rich. We are engaged to be married. Look at my ring. Have you ever seen a diamond so big?'.
I look at her ring and start to cry.

The girl I love with all my heart: Seven
My family and I stand over the grave and mourn the loss of Uncle Malcolm. Auntie Dawn is inconsolable. It is a desperately somber Wednesday afternoon.
Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I notice a girl dressed in white, running barefoot through the meadow of the dead. It is the girl I love with all my heart. She is shouting: Boys have never satisfied my inner desires but my new boyfriend is unlike anyone I have met before. He has touched me in places I truly thought were dead. I have never felt so alive. I have never felt so alive.
She waves at me.
I wave back at her and start to cry.

done for now.

Monday, June 11, 2007

and today,i smiled with the pouring rain;

Its just so super gosh cool, you electrify me.
Kay kay kentot busuk bachin.
Yes you do electrify me.
You make me wanna lala.

Cause I'm powerless.
My thoughts much dangerous than yours.
You left me in a stupor
And crawling from hallucinations.

This is turning me into a klutz.
But sunny sunshine.
There's still hope.

Oh God.
Guide me through this.

because i love that goatie-no-more.

puresensation.

First and foremost;

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FARID A.K.A IDZ A.K.A PARTNER IN CRIME DURING BORING WORKING HOURS UNDER STINKY SMELLY SEOUL GARDEN.

secondly;

THE SICKEST CHOREO YET.

MIMIN,DIY,LEARN IT.

AND TEACH ME.

i want to learn this choreo.

THANK YOU.

I suddenly miss dancing.

ON OTHER NEWS;

I met my little lady today.I missed her alot alot alot. And she's still the same. Still puny. Tak besar besar. 4 years old and still looks like 2.

Super duper cute;like always.

Me: "Adikkkk!...Siappaa kauuuuu!?"

Her: "Bapak kauuuu!"

Heee,yar,look what Jangan Pandang Belakang did to my princess.

kids nowadays are getting too smart.

Some even get handphones as birthday gifts when they are still in K2.

Oh my gosh.K2 lah.

As for her, whenever there's a camera, she will be there posing.

And she will never fail to ask me to show her the camera for her to look at the taken picture. When i was her age, camera's still not in my dictionary.

i have a feeling it would end very soon.
but i dont know;imy like crazy.
and i dont want this to end.
i really dont.
but i really feel it would.

thisjustcan'tbesummerlove;you'llsee.

Sunday, June 10, 2007

EDIT: Support Sleeq,people! (:

LIKE I ALWAYS ALWAYS SAY.

Like i always say,

For every ending, There's a new beginning.

Everything happens for a reason.

Like i said,

Leave your baggage at the back door

I'm leaving you the way I think it should be

We're always pulling into spaces that we can't back out of

Starting fights we can't talk our way out of them

How does it feel to be on the receiving end of this one?

Like I said,

I'm half way there and it's all on me

This is the way its got to be

Dancing on all these changes

So I walk around with this rope in my hand.

Like I said,

I dont know how it began

But the sight of you bring me sins

I won't be taken in again

For I'm trashing those days in the bin.

You can't see past my waving hands

But hey,open your eyes.

I am happy.

I am contented.

And it is time for you to go.

I found the one.

And too bad,that person's not you.

Like i always always say.

he's no longer.

Friday, June 8, 2007

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WAK GENDRENGGGG.

GEN GEN GEN GEN GEN GENDRENNNGGGGGGGGG.

EHEM.DAH 18.

MAT ROCKERS SESAT!!

HEEEE.
KAULAH KAWAN AKU BEB.

DARIPADA PRIMARY SCHOOL SAMPAI SEKARANG.

LETS ROCK TOGETHER AGAIN.

and if you are reading this,

ehem* dah legal.and ex kau hot.

and so,after so long,it was sabo time in Seoul Garden.

Fun fun.

1)ugh.Rambut berserak. Wak Gendreng,Emily, yours truly.

2) Edddyyy! and Bday boy. Eddy can sing well.Like seriously.Mat indon ni nyanyi power.
Oh,and saw alot of mamaks in the train today, they boarded from Toa Payoh.
And so i know, they must be from the dance comp Logan was talking about.
And, Killerbeez won third.
Kudos to you dudes.
And guess who won champs?
BORDERS.
Like takde orang lain.pppft.
Still,Congratulations.

And so,this is the second part of the STORY.

hah. and i wonder.
i knew this would happen.
but i still wonder.

the naked heart.

Thursday, June 7, 2007

PAPER BAGS AND PLASTIC HEARTS, THROW IT AWAY, FORGET YESTERDAY.

listening to: The great escape by Boys like girls.

im so mugging.

M-U-G-G-I-N-G.

What could be worst.No money.Staying at home. With alot of laundries that needs to be done. With 2 toilets to scrub. With a hall to sweep and mop. With dishes to cook. And all not done.And im here blogging because I feel shite. I feel so. Useless. Haaahaaaaaaaa.Argh.

And some rude stranger called looking for my mother(who is probably hoorah-hooray-ing in some place with her friends.), and when I said she's not at home, the rude stranger slammed the phone down without saying bye or a simple thank you. Come on lah.So rude lah. And that just added a fraction to my bad bad mood.Oh can it get any worst?

And brother just called. Calling me stupid, scolding me like he owns this world. Just because I couldnt hear him at the door.He was blaming me and all saying he couldnt get in and Im a stupid sister that is just so pekak that I didnt hear his knocks. Wadde. Who the hell does he think he is. Where's your keys dude. All he does is come home,make a big entry, eat eat eat,change and go off again to meet his matreps friends.Lepak-ing in some hawker centre or maybe do some useless sepak-takrawing. Argh. At least he can do something he likes,without momma screaming at his ears all the time. My gawd.And he always frets he leads a sucky life? That no one in this house understands him? That he is actually "alone". OH GET A LIFE BRO. Who's the one leading a sucky life now. I put up with you for a long time. I just kept my mouth shut.I even take everything you throw at me. LITERALLY throw. Oh,maybe you forgot that you once threw a freaking IRON ROD dining chair to me.And caused me lying there on the floor helpless.Oh it feels good right bro? To see your sister down there, lying, taking more of your punchs, because she is too weak to even defend herself. Hah.Yes,i've forgiven you.But I wont forget.Well,its the past.but I still remember. Can i just get some respect?Oh can it get any worst?

A person msn-ed me.Some person I dont even want to remember. Oh sheesh,you too,get a life. You are so yesterday. Oh can it get any worst?

And i miss my MrGigi badly.Like freakiing bad. OH CAN IT GET ANY WORST!

huhuhu.

just.shut.up.tiq.

AND IM GONNA MISS YOU LIKE A CHILD MISSES THEIR BLANKET.

AND BIG GIRLS DON'T CRY;

Work.
Steelheart's "shes gone" went on air just now.
Me and Wak Gendreng sang our hearts out.
We really don't care about the customers.
Or our manager that is.
And YES.
IT FEELS FREAKING GOOD.
To sing your heart out.
I went.. layyyydeeeeeeehhhhh wont you savee meeeee.
And Wak went.
My heartttt belongggss to youuuuu.
It feels sooo good to let your hair down and do what you really want.
For once.

After that,
Power98 just su*k.
They played Tempted to touch.
Right after my feeling feeling rockering.
WADDE.
Spoil the steam kann.
To all my ladies in the dancefloor.oho oho.
Tempted to touchX2.
Me and Wak looked at each other.
And.
Ewwww,I said.

To a friend;

You are changing. Please don't forget who you are.

Where you came from.

We're Muslims.

We have pride.

Please,friend,do take care of yourself.

Why are you doing this.

Why this sacrifices now?

And this,is not helping you.

This is really making you someone else.

Its not worth it.

And in case you wonder.

There's still 2 person who really cares.

I am one of them.

Here is something I want to share.

This story has 7 parts,

I will reveal one each day.

So here's the first one.

The girl I love with all my heart: One

I say: It is a lovely day.
The girl I love with all my heart replies: I love a boy. He is my boyfriend.
Damn and blast it, I think to myself, this isn't going very well, and so I say: You are beautiful.
The girl I love with all my heart smiles and says: My boyfriend is very handsome.

I think you would like him.
I nod, and start to cry.

bestfriends.